Monday, June 20, 2011

voodoo gets one more shot

If you are new to the blog, try this page first. Or this one.

Here's the deal with the ZBA hearing 6/21/11:

In August 2010, Gerry Ennis, zoning control officer of the town of Stuyvesant 12173, revoked my class 2 permit to operate my business based on a claim of loud barking. By October 2010, after intentional delay on the part of the town, I managed to lodge an appeal. The hearing tomorrow night is to hear my appeal of what Gerry Ennis did.

Here is the brief that should be what we consider tomorrow night.

Here are two science papers showing that the charge against me defy the laws of the universe.

I got a lot more documents I could present but I think these two should do it. 1) the case was mishandled legally; 2) the charge is not true because it cannot be true.

Therefore, the zoning board should vote to overturn the revocation of my permit. That will end this part of this battle. Anything else will prolong this farce.

Q: I still don't get this case.

A: Let's say you open the mail one day and it's a letter from the authorities: "Dear Will, You have kidnapped Santa's elves and until you either prove you didn't do it or let them go you will pay $200 per day in fine and fees."

So you write and ask how to appeal this decision. You have no right to appeal.

So you go ahead and prove that you didn't kidnap Santa's elves. You invite all the town over to have a look and see if anyone can spot them. You hire a professional elf finder, then another, and, nope, no sign of them anywhere.

Still, you keep paying the $200. After 6 months paying $200 per day, the guys accusing you of kidnapping the elves decide that they do need some evidence. So they get a video. They use this video to increase the fine to $300 per day.

After two months, they finally let you see the video. It doesn't show that you kidnapped Santa's elves. It's an episode of the Simpsons from 1997.

That's what happened!

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